Dear Mr. Chips,
I have been sitting under the willow tree in my front yard for some time now and you still haven’t showed up for our appointment. I am very distressed at this situation as I have already run out of beer two times and had to postpone my waiting for you several hours while going out to buy more beer.
If you did not wish to see me you should not have made the appointment. I have in my calendar set an appointment for you to see me on Tuesday, the Twelfth of October, 2007, which by my calculations was ten days ago and you have yet to appear or call to cancel, postpone or reschedule.
I shall no longer consume my time waiting for you as I have other appointments to wait for. Should you finally decide to appear, at this late date I must say, I’m afraid I shall not be able to see you. However, I am ever so needful of more beer I may reconsider a walk in appointment if you arrive not empty handed.
Mr. Charles Doodlebug
P.S. I like Budweiser but will accept a full bodied light beer if you must.