When my father died I was sad. And for a long while after I dreamed that he wasn't dead but somehow it was a mistake. Even though during my dreaming I knew he was cremated, he was at home sitting in his chair, just looking at me, talking with me and the others. I kept thinking how could he be there and cremated too? After I woke up I still wondered if he would answer the phone if I called.
And sometimes I would catch myself wanting to call him and see what he thinks about whatever it was I was bothered by at the time. And now, seven years have passed since he died. I no longer dream the strange dreams and catch myself almost picking up the phone. I have settled in my mind that I am alone in the world and able to cope without him. Which is what he always wanted for me.